Let me start off by saying that I am a true believer in the Lord and I admit that from the time I got married up until two weeks ago my spiritual connection with God has gotten smaller and smaller.
I want to continue by saying that my husband HATES the Lord. He just doesn’t want anything to do with God at all. That should have been a sign for me. I was blinded by love to see that Chris did not love God as I did. We have been having hardship for a few months now and it has just been getting worse. I was blinded by the Devil and was not connected with God anymore. I lost my way through all the fighting and the arguments.
Two weeks ago my husband left. He told me straight out “I don’t love you anymore.” Wow! that broke my heart. Let me tell you I tried to fix it, I tried to get him to remember the good and we could work things out…it was too late. Within two days he was gone. He left to Colorado to visit his friends…turns out that he took another women with him. Now that broke me even more. I cried and blamed myself for not being enough for him. I was trying to think back on how I could have saved this marriage.
I couldn’t save this marriage. I was lost in my own emotions and my broken heart. Now let me tell you something, when the Holy Spirit says its time to change, it’s time to change. Oh boy how hard did God hit my with his Holy Spirit. He showed me that I have lost my way and I needed to get back to my spiritual connection with God. Now don’t get me wrong, I am still in a lot of pain but my husband and this girl have been gone for two weeks now and I am learning to put my trust in God and allow him to work on me. I am praying everyday for my husband to also be hit by the Holy Spirit and find his way. Call me stupid but we are still married and as his wife I need to get down on my knees and pray for my husband.
I am still angry but I try my best to give all my emotions and my worries to the Lord. I am working on having my connection back with God because He is my true Love. This is the hardest thing I have ever gone through and I will better myself and I will be VICTORIOUS in the name of the Lord all mighty! My husband will be saved!
I am still going through tribulations and worries but I have the support of my family and now getting closer to the word of God. I ask my readers to say a small prayer for me and my husband and continue to stay strong in your Faith as well. I will give updates on how wonderful God has been working in my life and I want to express the Glory of God and spread his word on how he is the answer to everything!
“Wait on the Lord, be of good courage…” -Psalm 27:14